Saturday, March 10, 2007

Wonderings and Weather

I wonder how many dogs I see roaming the streets each day.
I wonder how my clothes will every dry with all this rain.
I wonder what kind of resources my B-family really has.
I wonder what other mysterious things are in the soup I eat for lunch.
I wonder if I will become friends with the workers at this internet cafe.
I wonder how many total showers I´ll take here.
I wonder when/if I´ll be fluent in Spanish.
I wonder who else from home will get engaged or married while I´m here.
I wonder how long it will take for my package to reach me.
I wonder what my B-sister will eat once we run out of JIF Peanut Butter at my house.
I wonder if people here know I`m a Christian.
I wonder if they wonder what I`m doing in a city like El Alto.
I wonder what I´ll do when I return to the states.
I wonder where I´ll live.
I wonder how I´ll be a different person.

It`s both easy and difficult to imagine life after Bolivia. It`s easy to imagine my warm bed, conversations with family and friends, familiar food, grass to play in, and multiple showers. It`s difficult to imagine what will be different in my life as a result of my experiences here. I like that I feel so present here. Besides missing you, I`m not distracted by much. It`s a wondeful phenomenon. It`s hard to think about making plans when I`m so far away, and yet I know I need to be responsible.

I just finished ¨Gracias! A Latin American Journal¨by Henri Nouwen. Near the end of his musings as a priest in Bolivia and Peru, he wonders where he`ll end up when he returns to the states. He admitted his uncertainity about where God was calling him, and recognized it as an invitation to draw deeper into coversation and relationship with God. He knew that as a result of drawing nearer, answers would begin to form. I know this is the place for me to be seeking the Lord`s will for my life...
I wonder when I`ll know.

********
5 day weather forecast for El Alto:
Rain. Rain. Rain. Mostly cloudy with showers. Rain. I`m wishing I hadn`t done laundry yesterday because it`s just not going to get dry!
Low: 35 degrees. High: 55 degrees
I can see my breath inside my room...

2 comments:

ryanmortinson said...

i also wonder a lot about if/how i'll be changed by this experience and what will happen after.

maybe we should open a consulting service together...

we don't have dryers here either. i wonder if america is the only place in the world that does?

i also wonder if you can pray that clothes dry faster? is that allowed?

Jessi said...

I think there's either a song or a book or both burried in the midst of these wonderings...don't know.

It's interesting to me that you are wondering some of the same things that I am. hmm...for me these wonderings usually turn into my deepest and most intense prayers.

love you, knowing that the Lord is faithful...and will make those clothes dry (Ryan I actually think it's totally allowed :) )